For the past month or so, I’ve been trying to work on my spiritual health as well as my physical. Mike and I have been attending church regularly and feel that this is the church for us. I tried to sign up for some group meetings on Saturday’s but the woman who was trying to set it up for me never called me back! I’m sure she’s been busy and I’ve slipped through the cracks. However, I’ve not let that stop my growth. It would be nice to have a group of people further along in their Spiritual lives than I am to talk to and bounce questions off of, but right now that’s not in the cards. Maybe some other time.
I just finished reading Mary Beth Chapman’s “Choosing to SEE: A Journey of Struggle and Hope.”
What an incredible story. I’ve always enjoyed Steven Curtis Chapman’s music, and I knew of their tragedy (losing a 5 year old daughter in a horrible accident) but to be able to see how they made it through that time and what good deeds came from such a horrible incident is very moving. Their faith is what I want for myself, for my family.
This may be more of my “dark clouds” than anything else, but I have this overwhelming feeling that God is preparing me for a moment of profound sadness and heartbreak. Why? I’ve had three deaths in my family this year, two of which were unexpected. My cousin was buried on Saturday. She was 50 years old and was killed from her husband running over her with his truck (yes, there is more to the story but I don’t feel this is the place to go in to that). Her death was completely preventable and while I want to say pointless, I think there is a reason for everything although we can’t see it just yet.
I’ve also been led to read a couple of books that are centered around dealing with sorrow and loss. Maybe I’ve been drawn to them because of the losses we’ve had this year, but I can’t help but feel there’s a reason why God wants me to build up my defenses. And…this terrifies me to no end. I know some people would say it’s all just a coincidence. However, I don’t believe in coincidences, I do believe that everything happens for a reason. Just like I believe people come into our lives for a purpose and eventually leave when that purpose has been served, as difficult as that can be. I hope I’m wrong about this, goodness knows I’ve been wrong plenty of times in the past, but I just had to “talk it out”.
On that pleasant note, Happy Monday everyone! 😀